Life’s Best Comforter - Martin Wiles

All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. 2 Corinthians 1:3 NLT

My wife and I are now the matriarch and patriarch of our family.

My youngest brother and I discussed the concept not long ago. Although our mom is still living, her Alzheimer’s keeps her from managing her affairs, leaving me as her POA to take that responsibility. And meaning that her three boys are the patriarchs of their respective family branches.

I remember the sorrow I felt when my father died, but at least I had my mother left. When she’s gone, there will be no parents left. My wife’s parents are gone, as are her two older brothers. The day has approached when our children and grandchildren must look to us, as we did to our parents. How we’ll handle the last parent dying, I’m not sure.

According to Paul, God is life’s best comforter, and he needed comforting. Since trusting Christ as his Savior, he had faced turmoil and trials. They hounded him like dogs on a rabbit’s trail. Beatings, stonings, jail time. He faced them all. Yet he found comfort in knowing that God was in control and that he was doing God’s will.

God hasn’t changed roles. As he comforted Paul, he comforts us. And not only when we lose a loved one, but also as we face daily life’s challenges. Paying attention to how God comforts us helps us be better comforters.

God’s comfort never runs out, nor does he tire of giving it. Giving comfort to others can be taxing and drain our emotions. God can handle the task, for he is all-powerful. Nothing we face is too difficult for him to know how to comfort us.

Comforting others is often inconvenient. Jesus’ ministry was filled with interruptions from others. When we choose to comfort others, we, too, will have to deal with being inconvenienced. Death, accidents, and broken relationships never happen at a convenient time.

Comforting others takes time we could use for something else, perhaps something more enjoyable. True comfort is more than shooting someone a text or email. Or posting a prayer comment on their Facebook post. It involves hands-on activities when possible.

While comforting others is time-consuming, doing so brings us comfort. God designed us to be involved in others’ lives. Doing so fulfills part of his plan for our lives. We can only fully appreciate God’s comfort when we channel it to others.

Don’t soak up God’s comfort without squeezing out some for others.

Father, use me as an instrument of comfort to those who are hurting. 

I invite you to try my book Hurt, Hope, and Healing in eBook or paperback. If you seek hope and healing because of the hurts you have faced, this book is for you. Click on the title above to order your copy. And thanks to all our faithful followers who share our posts on Facebook, Twitter, and Linkedin.

How to Master the Art of Good Comforting - Martin Wiles

I have heard all this before. What miserable comforters you are! Job 16:2 NLT

Regardless of where she went, she couldn’t find comfort. It seemed as if no one knew how to master the art of good comforting.

Leah and her husband were never apart. They even volunteered at the same place after they retired. Both appeared to be in good health, so you can imagine Leah’s shock when her husband dropped dead. Jeff was outside cutting grass. He had no recent health concerns. But when Leah saw him stumble into the doorway and say he wasn’t feeling well, she could see something wasn’t right. Within a few minutes, he had slumped over, never to recover.

Although months had passed since Jeff’s death, Leah still mourned and suffered with anxiety and depression. She went to counselors, pastors, and friends, but nothing seemed to soothe her mental agony. She couldn’t focus and struggled to make it through each day. She left her old church, saying she just couldn’t stand to attend without Jeff. Leah longed for lasting comfort, but couldn’t find it anywhere.

Job didn’t find it with his fair-weather friends either. He had lost almost everything a person could lose and still survive. What’s worse, God permitted his woes to prove to Satan that Job would maintain his loyalty to God despite extreme adversity. The only comfort Job’s friends could muster was telling him he had sinned. Confess, and things would get better, was their advice. Job, however, had nothing to confess. He maintained his innocence and muddled through his pain and sorrow.

Job’s friends did what is typical. They thought they had to say something to soothe his grief—and they did. But what they said didn’t do the trick, nor was it biblically sound.

Telling someone that God needed another angel, or that you know how they feel, is hollow comfort. God doesn’t take life to get angels, nor do humans become angels after death. And no two people grieve over the same episode in the same way.

Our presence during grief is better than words. Sharing truth from God’s Word can be comforting, but timing is critical. Sitting, listening, and letting the person cry on your shoulder is better. When the time is right, they’ll ask, and then you can share words of wisdom they might need to hear. For the moment, silence is golden, and practical help is priceless.

Comforting those who grieve is tricky business. Before you speak or act, pray and ask God for direction and wisdom.

Father, give me wisdom to know how to comfort those who are hurting with grief. 

I invite you to try my book Hurt, Hope, and Healing in eBook or paperback. If you seek hope and healing because of the hurts you have faced, this book is for you. Click on the title above to order your copy. And thanks to all our faithful followers who share our posts on Facebook, Twitter, and Linkedin.

Finding Comfort When God Draws Near - Martin Wiles

But the Lord came down to look at the city and the tower the people were building. Genesis 11:5 NLT

They popped over the treetops and whizzed along the nape of the field.

When I was a young lad, crop dusters were common in the flat farmland. Fields were planted with cotton, corn, and soybeans. Laws preventing certain chemicals, which we now know cause cancer and other diseases, had not been passed. So farmers and crop dusters spread cotton poison to protect their crops.

Visiting my grandfather’s farm and sitting on the front porch, watching planes crop dust the neighboring fields, was one of my favorite activities. From out of nowhere, the plane would appear at tree-top level, drop to just above the cotton, drop its load, and then pull up just before reaching power lines, homes, or trees. Enduring the stench of the cotton poison was almost more than I could bear, but it was worth it to see this acrobat’s antics.

There was a time long ago when God came low. When a group of people got together and decided to build the Tower of Babel. Seemingly an innocent task … until you read the rest of the story. Doing so was about selfishness and pagan worship. God dropped a load on them. Not poison, but the confusion of their languages and thus the end of their project.

A few thousand years later, God came low again. This time when he allowed his Son to take on human flesh and die for humanity’s sins. But he didn’t stop with that. After Jesus ascended back into heaven, God sent his Holy Spirit on the Day of Pentecost, and the church was born. The psalmist was right when he said that God delights in every detail of their lives (Psalm 37:23).

As I delighted in watching the crop dusters fly low, so I enjoy knowing God flies low into my life’s experiences. And not only mine, but everyone’s who will call on him. He’s never too busy, nor is he ever unconcerned. What concerns us, no matter how insignificant, concerns our Creator. He can come down for our needs and everyone else’s at the same time. We don’t have to take a number or wait in line. God flies so low we can reach up and touch his grace, mercy, and assistance at any time we choose.

Let God fly low into every detail of your life.

Father, give me faith to reach out for you in every circumstance of my life, knowing you are as low as the stretch of my fingertips.

I invite you to try my book Grits, Grace, and God in eBook or paperback. If you want a daily dose of God's grace, this book is for you. Click on the title above to order your copy. And thanks to all our faithful followers who share our posts on Facebook, Twitter, and Linkedin.

Life After Death: The Comfort Behind Being Absent from the Body - Martin Wiles

Yes, we are fully confident, and we would rather be away from these earthly bodies, for then we will be at home with the Lord. 2 Corinthians 5:8 NLT

Death. Funerals. They’re both a part of life. I don’t enjoy either of them, but they come with the life-on-earth territory. Death respects no age or person. Comforting those who have lost loved ones challenges the best of us. And Bible verses don’t always do the trick. I’ve seen anger, frustration, bitterness, confusion, and relief. However—and whenever—death comes, separation takes place, and separations are never easy. Attempting to comfort, I have made the statement: “You know what the Bible says, ‘To be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord.’” Still, knowing a loved one is with the Lord doesn’t completely eliminate the sense of loss the one left behind feels.

Paul’s life since trusting Christ had been rough. As he panhandled the gospel over the known world, his enemies hounded his steps. Stonings, beatings, jailings, false accusations, desertions by friends. He faced them all. But comfort came through his belief that if they took his life, he would be at home with his Savior.

The concept of an afterlife—as most Christians now understand it—developed slowly. In the Old Testament, the afterlife was viewed as a shadowy existence. Not until the New Testament was the concept more fully developed. A blissful place called heaven for those who’ve accepted Christ as their Savior, but torment and judgment for those who reject him.

While some believe nothing happens between death and the final resurrection, many, perhaps most, believe we are composed of body, soul, and spirit—or at least body and spirit. Either way, we have a part that lives on after death before the resurrection of our bodies. Believing this is a comforting thought when we lose loved ones, if they know Christ as Savior. We may not have them anymore, but a day will come when we’ll see them again.

Death is not the end of our existence. Life continues. Make sure your and your loved ones’ eternity is secure with God in heaven.

Father, thank you for the hope of an eternity with you when we place our faith in your Son. 

I invite you to try my book Hurt, Hope, and Healing in eBook or paperback. If you seek hope and healing because of the hurts you have faced, this book is for you. Click on the title above to order your copy. And thanks to all our faithful followers who share our posts on Facebook, Twitter, and Linkedin.

Series: Oh, the Things We Say: I Know How You Feel - Martin Wiles

Martha said to Jesus, “Lord, if only you had been here, my brother would not have died. John 11:21 NLT

Tragedy had struck. What could I say? I was tempted to resort to “I know how you feel.” But then, I thought better.

I’ve watched people endure their share of tragedies. A husband whose wife decided to drive while drunk. Her actions led to the death of their small child. A father whose daughter was innocently riding her bike through their subdivision and was hit and killed. Good friends whose daughter tried to ride a bicycle that was too large and accidentally rolled into the path of an oncoming truck. A couple whose child was born prematurely and languished in the neonatal intensive care unit for months and then grew up mentally challenged.

I’ve probably been guilty of saying it, but even if I haven’t, I’ve heard many others say those infamous words: “I know how you feel,” or “I know what you’re going through.” Innocent words spoken with good intentions, but words that mean little if anything to the one who is grieving—and perhaps questioning God at the same time.

Mary and Martha were probably feeling a little confused themselves. Their brother, Lazarus, was sick. So they sent for Jesus, thinking he would heal him. Instead of coming immediately, Jesus waited until Lazarus had died. Martha was confused.

Even if we’ve experienced something similar to what a person is going through, saying “I know how you feel” isn’t the best response to their grief. We don’t know how they feel. We know how we felt, but we can’t get inside their body and experience their emotions. The statement usually falls on deaf ears. They may also perceive the words as an empty platitude that means nothing.

When a person is grieving, spending time with them and saying little is a good practice. If we feel the need to speak, saying, “I can’t imagine what you’re going through” or “How can I help?” are better statements. Better yet is thinking of some way to help without asking the person. In their state of mind, they usually can’t think of what they need anyway. If we have experienced something similar to their tragedy, we can always share our story and tell how God brought us through.

Depend on God to give you the right thing to say when you’re helping a grieving person.

Father, as you comfort me in my time of grief, so give me wisdom to know how to help others in their times of grief.

I invite you to try my book A Whisper in the Woods: Quiet Escapes in a Noisy World. No one escapes life's hurts, but quiet places help us regain our perspective. Click on the title above to order your copy. And thanks to all our faithful followers who share our posts on Facebook, Twitter, and Linkedin.

In the Fog - Anita van der Elst

And the glory of the LORD settled down on Mount Sinai, and the cloud covered it for six days. On the seventh day the LORD called to Moses from inside the cloud. Exodus 24:16 NLT 

A line in a novel sparked my thoughts. A character remarked, “A fog of books sounds like a very good problem to have.”

Whether driving through fog patches, being unable to discern clearly what lies ahead, or feeling like my mind is foggy as I try to concentrate on serious concepts, I never saw fog as beneficial. But then, thoughts of how God expressed himself through the cloud on Mount Sinai and later in the Temple arose. I remembered that clouds are similar to fog because they are both formed of water vapor. Jesus referred to the living water he would give anyone who believes in him. The Word of God refreshes like cool water from a bubbling spring.

Indeed, I cannot see through the fog or the cloud. But when I allow myself to be enveloped by God’s Spirit, like Moses on Mount Sinai, when I peruse God's words written down in the Bible, that great “fog of books,” and rely on him to counsel me on my steps, I experience refreshing comfort. Through that screen of spiritual condensation, the Lord protects me from seeing what could frighten me. He drenches me with ample opportunity to trust in him as I move along step by step.  

Avail yourself of the refreshing condensation of God's Word. Take a step into the cloud of his presence today.

Anita van der Elst finds joy in creating with words, believing God gifted her with the desire to do so. Married to her best friend, Edward, since 1976, she is a proud mom of four adult children and Oma to three of the most delightful grandchildren ever. Other joys in her life include bringing beauty to Facebook through photos she takes on her iPhone, exploring the state parks in the PNW, facilitating a small group of women, and participating in a Bible study. 

I invite you to try my newest book, Grits, Grace, and Grands, in eBook or paperback. If you are a grandparent or just want to hear grandparent stories, this book is for you. Click on the title above to order your copy. And thanks to all our faithful followers who share our posts on Facebook, Twitter, and Linkedin.

Soul Comfort - Martin Wiles

Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10 NKJV

A red sign that read, “COVID-19 HOME UNDER QUARANTINE” decorated the door of every home the virus had infected.

Newscasts informed citizens of conditions in America and sometimes in China, but I rarely heard of conditions in any other country. However, I knew people fared poorly in India because my missionary friend who serves there periodically told me so. His recent message gave a sobering scene.

The virus had infected twelve of his neighbors, who were hospitalized. Officials had extended the national lockdown for another month. As in America, many companies were forced to close, and thousands were unemployed and struggling to make ends meet. What differed, however, were the daily wage laborers in India—something foreign to America. Thousands had returned to their villages, walking more than one hundred miles to get there, a journey that would take six to seven days.

One night, a truck had run over and killed eight of the day laborers as they slept on the street—two of them children. A goods train had run over another seventeen—six of whom were children—as they slept on railroad tracks during the night. Many of those walking were pregnant women or mothers with small children.

The news saddened me. As terrible as things seemed in America with millions infected by the virus, things could have been worse.

I prayed the night of my friend’s message that God would protect His children, give strength to medical professionals and first responders, provide wisdom for those working on a vaccine, and protect those who worked to manufacture and transport essential goods.

Many things lie beyond our control. The virus did. Yet, I remember God’s promise through Isaiah.

Following Christ doesn’t necessarily mean we won’t contract COVID or some other virus, but we do have the promise that God will meet our needs. He is as good as His word. When He says not to fear, we shouldn’t fear, but trust. We walk by faith, not sight. When we do, it builds our faith and character. Spiritual growth takes place, and we form a message we can share with others who face difficult times.

God is in the business of comforting our souls. Don’t let anything deprive you of the peace found in trusting Him. Fear not, weary pilgrim.

Father, when my soul is weary from traveling through this difficult world, comfort me with the promise of Your presence. 

Tweetable: Where do you look for soul care? 

I invite you to try my newest book, Grits, Grace, and Grands, in eBook or paperback. If you are an editor who wants to hone your grammar skills or someone who just wants to improve your writing or speaking, this is the book for you. Click on the title above to order your copy. And thanks to all our faithful followers who share our posts on Facebook, Twitter, and Linkedin.

Bottled-up Tears - Martin Wiles

You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. Psalm 56:8 NLT

With a 6 ¼-ounce glass Coke bottle, he defrosted freezers.

With few exceptions, such as at grocery stores, my grandfather knew nothing about putting ice cream in freezers that didn’t need defrosting. The ice cream freezers his company donated to customers—or the ones the customers themselves owned—were not frost-free. Over time, chunks of ice accumulated on the sides, making it difficult to stock the boxes of ice cream in them neatly.

When the ice reached a certain level, my grandfather would look for an empty Coke crate in the store. These were the days when a person could return empty bottles for a small deposit of money. Store owners kept the empty crates after they put the bottles in the distributing machines.

My grandfather walked to the crate, picked up a small Coke bottle, and went to work, using the bottom of the bottle to knock the ice loose from the sides of the freezer. Within five minutes, he had defrosted the freezer and tossed the ice outside in the hot sun to melt.

Nothing like a good bottle. I remember when companies first put their soda products in aluminum cans. I hated it. It changed the entire taste of the product. Then came plastic bottles. This improved the taste a little, but nothing tastes like a soda—or any other drinkable liquid product—packaged in a bottle. The product also stays colder. Give me a bottle any day.

The psalmist enjoyed bottles too. Not for drinking, but because God bottled his tears in them. He had many sorrows during his lifetime—as most of us do. But God took note of them and bottled them up.

God does the same for anyone. He loves us with unconditional love and notices our life’s sorrows. Some tears He sends to mature us or to stretch our faith, but many come because we live in a sin-infested world where things break down and go awry.

But God does more than notice our sorrows. He bottles them, giving us the strength to endure each one, no matter how intense they are. By depending on the guidance of His Spirit, we discover the strength to put one foot in front of the other when we don’t think we can. We grieve, but we keep moving until things change—or until we accept our new norm.

Coke bottles eventually increased in size, and God’s bottle is large enough to handle all your tears. Put them in His bottle.

Prayer: Father, thank You for bottling our tears so we can move on with life.

Tweetable: Are your tears bottled up? 

Thanks to all our faithful followers who share our posts! We also invite you to follow and like us on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, and Instagram. Help us spread God's encouragement through His Love Lines.

Throwback Tuesday - Held by God - Martin Wiles

For three long months, they paced the floor and listened as I screamed for relief. 

When a baby cries for more than three hours in a day, for more than three days in a week, and for more than three weeks, they are usually diagnosed with infantile colic. The cause is generally unknown, and only a small percentage of infants who endure it has an organic disease causing it. More disturbing is what colic can lead to: postpartum depression, child abuse, stress, and breastfeeding failure. According to Mom, I was a victim for three months—at which time it ceased as suddenly as it had appeared. Fortunately, I didn’t have to endure this terror with my own children. 

Of all the things that prompt me to need God’s comfort, a colicky child seems quite tame; I often long for his assistance because the fish I have to fry are larger (Translation: I have bigger issues to deal with.). Don’t be afraid, for I am with you…I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. (Isaiah 41:10 NLT)

I take comfort in trying times by realizing God inhabits my hurts. Regardless of others’ actions, he never leaves me alone. Whether the trial is initiated or allowed by him is immaterial. His presence is all that matters. Step by step, hand in hand, he leads me over rocky crags, along narrow paths, and through lonesome valleys as he did Much-Afraid in Hannah Hurnard’s Hinds’ Feet on High Places. 

As my father did, God holds me tightly when I’m overwhelmed by life’s testings. Why a tight grip calms a colicky child, I’m not sure. Perhaps it’s simply the comfort of knowing someone has your situation under control—and God does. Nothing in my life careens out of control when God’s monitoring the circumstances.  

Many a parent assures their small child—who can’t understand what they’re saying, with the words, “It’s gonna be alright. Daddy (or Momma) has you.” I assure myself with the same: “God’s got this. Everything will be okay.” And it will. 

Are you allowing God to hold you securely when the times are tough?

Prayer: God of all compassion, may we feel Your arms of comfort surround us when we are overcome by pain, disappointment, and grief. 

Tweetable: Where do you go for comfort? 

Thanks to all our faithful followers who share our posts! We also invite you to follow and like us on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, and Instagram. Help us spread God's encouragement through His Love Lines.

Comfort from the Commander - Martin Wiles

The Lord of Heaven’s Armies is here among us; the God of Israel is our fortress. Psalm 46:7 NLT

The t-boned car exploded and landed against a fence.

After instructing my wife to call 911, I ran across the road, not wanting to look at what I anticipated finding in the car. But I heard a voice. One I knew. The daughter of a fellow church member. The young lady was alive, but severely injured. I comforted her, telling her help was on the way. My plans for the day changed. Instead of going to the hospital I was headed for, I went where they took her and arrived before her husband—whom I also had to comfort.

I also can’t forget the young man whose wife was driving drunk and wrecked, killing their two-year-old child. When I received the news, I took off for his house. He sat on the couch, not saying a word. I sat with him, and did the same. Sometimes, comfort involves no words, just presence.

The psalmist took comfort in knowing the Lord of Heaven’s armies dwelled amid His people. Joshua did too before he led the people to attack the city of Jericho. So did Moses. God appeared to him in a flaming bush and assured him He would be with him as he approached Pharaoh and instructed him to free the Israelite slaves. Abraham felt comfort through the presence of angels who showed up as guests at his tent.

God’s comfort comes in various ways, as scripture shows and as experience teaches—but it always comes. When God sends us on a mission, or when we move through trying experiences, He distributes His peace and guidance.

God’s comfort often comes through relationships. Friends at church, work, or school. We are God’s hands, feet, ears, and mouth. He doesn’t have to use us, but wants to. And in the process, we learn to empathize with others.

Sometimes, God’s comfort is no more than an inner voice assuring us everything will be okay. We don’t know how it will—or when it will—but the inner voice sounds so powerful that we have no choice but to believe it.

Scripture also delivers God’s comfort. The canon is complete and filled with God’s comforting words. Sometimes through stories and sometimes through direct assurance.

As God comforts us, He expects us to channel His comfort to others. 

Think of ways you can take comfort to those who are hurting.

Tweetable: Are you taking comfort to others?

Prayer: Father, we thank You for Your comfort and ask You to send us to others to channel that comfort.

 

Looking for a wide selection of genres in inspirational books at discount prices? Click here to see selections.

Thanks to all our faithful followers who are "sharing" our posts--please keep it up! We also invite you to follow and like us on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, and Instagram. Help us spread God's encouragement through His Love Lines.

Dying from Grief - Martin Wiles

I am dying from grief; my years are shortened by sadness. Psalm 31:10 NLT

I opened his email and read the sad news.

Santhosh’s a missionary in India who works with orphans and widows. His latest request had grief written all over it. A cyclone and sea waves had made life miserable for many in parts of his hometown. Two hundred fishermen were missing. Thirty-two dead bodies had been found. Hundreds lost their homes—swept away by the sea. The catastrophe made more orphans and widows for him to care for. Temporary shelters housed more than 10,000. I imagined the grief the survivors experienced. He asked for my prayers, and of course, I agreed.

The psalmist experienced grief. So intense he felt as if he would die from it. Sadness would surely shorten his years. I don’t know that I’ve ever experienced grief so penetrating, but I have grieved and watched others grieve also.

Grief’s existence is undeniable, but the forms it takes are as variegated as the people who experience it. Surely, none of the survivors in India will grieve the exact same way or for the same period of time. Some will pull themselves up quickly and go on with life while others will feel crippling effects for much longer.

Life is a mixture of grief and joy. Neither one consistently characterizes our existence. We’ll feel both numerous times during life. Expecting one or the other consistently is unrealistic.

Interceding for those who grieve—regardless of which way they do it—is our duty. We may not understand the nature of their grief, but we aren’t in their shoes. We simply need to pray for God to strengthen them so they won’t die from their grief—physically or emotionally.

Assisting them is important also. They may not know what they need, so asking might not give us the answer we seek. Common sense—along with spending time with them—should reveal practical ways we can help.

Taking time to understand the stages of grief and the various ways people experience it helps us not to be judgmental when people grieve in ways we may think are unhealthy. Grief looks differently for everyone.

Regardless of the nature of your grief, God’s Spirit can guide you through—and He will also enable you to help others through as well.

Tweetable: Is grief overwhelming you?

Prayer: Father, we know healthy grief is from You. Guide us through our periods of grief, reminding us to trust You for each of our needs. 

Looking for a wide selection of genres in inspirational books at discount prices? Click here to see selections.

Thanks to all our faithful followers who are "sharing" our posts--please keep it up! We also invite you to follow and like us on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, and Instagram. Help us spread God's Word.