Overcoming A Complaining Spirit-Taking Responsibility by Martin Wiles

Series: Overcoming A Complaining Spirit

He was in again. ISS or In School Suspension. While in middle school, my son seemed strangely attracted to this place. He got in less trouble here. After all, he owned his own cubicle. No one could bother him nor could he annoy anyone else.

Questioning why he was there produced interesting answers. Occasionally he confessed his crime and welcomed the consequences. More frequently, he complained that someone else was responsible. They were talking, but the teacher nailed him. Or the teacher just had it in for him. Seldom was anything his fault, and rarely did he want to take responsibility.

God allowed the ground to open and swallow the group who rebelled against his chosen leaders. But instead of admitting the rebels made the mistake of disobeying, the people complained. The next day the whole Israelite community grumbled against Moses and Aaron. “You have killed the LORD’s people,” they said (Numbers 16:41).

The attempt to escape responsibility for life’s mistakes and acts of disobedience against God is widespread. Complaining that our failures are someone else’s fault is always preferable. Adam tried to pass the responsibility buck when God confronted his disobedience, and Eve continued the pattern.

Admitting our failures and taking responsibility for our sins relieves us of the need to complain that someone or something else is to blame. Salvation depends on admitting our sins, healthy relationships are formed when each person assumes personal accountability, and a responsible life is bred by owning up to our mistakes. Blaming and complaining may appear easier, but admitting responsibility and taking ownership are healthier.

Prayer: Almighty God, Father of mercy and grace, move us to acceptance and repentance when we’ve missed Your standard rather than complaints that others have led us down an erroneous path.
 

Overcoming A Complaining Spirit-Learning Contentment

Series: Overcoming A Complaining Spirit

William was a complainer as I quickly discovered when becoming his supervisor.

I once worked as a weaver at a local textile mill. After a series of layoffs, I found myself sweeping floors, but a fortunate set of events led to a promotion. Whereas I once worked with William, now he worked for me. But he and others weren’t happy. Everyone in the cloth room had slaved there longer than me, and William had applied twice for my position and been rejected. His complaints materialized into bitterness and work slow-downs.

I’ve been known to complain about situations too. Such as when I was hired by a temporary staffing agency to work in a local industry. I toiled just as diligently as permanent employees but received no benefits. Nor was I paid their salaries. So I complained.

Korah, Dathan and Abiram led a complaint rebellion against Moses. They weren’t content to follow; they wanted the reigns. They came as a group to oppose Moses and Aaron…“You have gone too far! The whole community is holy…. Why then do you set yourselves above the LORD’s assembly?” (Numbers 16:3)

Complaining seems to come naturally when things don’t go our way or when we’re not where we think we should be at a certain stage in life. Our dreams haven’t materialized. Others are getting ahead instead of us. But believing God has a plan for our lives-as well as a timetable for the plan’s unfolding, along with accepting his chart as better than our selfish one, will alleviate our complaining spirit. Contentment comes from placing ourselves at God’s disposal regardless of whether it’s where we think we should be. Let God’s plan transform your attitude and life.

Prayer: Father, we confess we don’t always understand Your map, but give us a spirit of contentment to accept it nevertheless.

Overcoming A Complaining Spirit-Trusting God’s Promises

Series: Overcoming A Complaining Spirit

Sheriff Andy Taylor from the Andy Griffith Show was quickly in a bind after his son rambled up to the porch and introduced his new friend. George-or Tex as he preferred, was a runaway from a neighboring town, and Opie didn’t want his Pa to report him. Though he initially promised not to, in time Andy was forced to perform his duty and call the young man’s parents. Opie initially complained but eventually understood his father’s decision.

God’s people felt he had broken his promises to them and complained. Their voices rose in a great chorus of complaint against Moses and Aaron (Numbers 14:2 NLT). Though God sent plagues to persuade the Egyptian ruler to free them and provided manna, meat and water for them on their wilderness journey, they were tired of it and ached to enter the Promised Land. Now the scouts who surveyed their future home returned with rumors of giants and heavily fortified cities. Conquering the land appeared impossible. God apparently had broken his promise, so they complained.

Complaining is the easy way out when it appears God has been unfaithful to his promises. “Why am I struggling financially?” “Why do my relationships turn sour?” “Why is my child making poor choices?” “Why did I get laid off?” All questions that can lead to a complaining spirit when we fail to remember God’s promise that he loves us and will supply every need according to his timetable and our best interest. Heaven’s perspective is often radically different than ours, but God will never break his promise to care for us regardless of how bleak the circumstances appear. Trusting God’s trustworthiness eliminates our need to complain.

Prayer: Sufficient Savior, when we’re tempted to grumble because it appears You’ve broken promises, enable us to rely on You instead.

Overcoming A Complaining Spirit-Struggling With Priorities

Series: Overcoming A Complaining Spirit

I was sauntering through the most taxing situation I’d ever faced and convinced God would understand my decision to stop.

While merely a tot, my parents taught me to tithe. Each time I came into money-whether a gift or earned, they reminded me about God’s share. When the offering plate passed, I tossed in my dues. But now I was complaining and trying to convince myself God understood my circumstances and would endorse my decision to adjust his portion. I struggled with this priority shift for several years until I finally gave in and tithed regardless of whether I could afford it.

The Israelites also struggled with priorities. God’s main concern for them was freedom from slavery and entrance into their Promised Land. He had accomplished the first and was in the process of completing the second when their misplaced priorities interfered. God gave them daily manna, but they wanted fish, cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions and garlic. Then the foreign rabble who were traveling with the Israelites began to crave the good things of Egypt. And the people of Israel also began to complain (Numbers 11:4 NLT).

As I wanted God’s blessings without sacrifice, so God’s ancient people preferred their past situation to God’s present circumstances and complained when God didn’t deliver. Jumbled priorities make complaining easy and seemingly justifiable. Thinking we know better than God, we gripe when he doesn’t deliver. Loving God, our families and then others as ourselves should be our chief priorities. As we do, God promises food, shelter and clothing. When we’re obedient to the former and satisfied with the latter, we’ll find less to complain about. Are jumbled priorities causing you to complain?

Prayer: Father, when we’re tempted to complain about things we don’t have, remind us that in Christ we have all we need.

Overcoming A Complaining Spirit-Praying Through Problems

Series: Overcoming A Complaining Spirit

I knew the story before she arrived. “She stepped on my foot. I don’t think she meant to, but it hurt.” “Are you okay,” I asked. She was and trotted off.

No sooner had she ambled away than another wobbled up, pointed with a crooked finger and said “I was playing with the basketball and he took it away.” I whispered, “I’ll watch him.”

Sadly, this all-too-common complaining spirit follows us into adulthood. It did with the Israelites. Now the people complained about their hardships in the hearing of the LORD, and when he heard them his anger was aroused (Numbers 11:1).

Having endured 400 years slaving for a foreign power, you’d think freedom would have squelched any complaints, but they were barely out of Egypt when they started. Their complaints began when they saw the Red Sea before them and Pharaoh’s armored chariots pulled by bellowing horses behind them. “Moses, why did you bring us into the desert to die?” God delivered them, but they quickly whined about their food and water shortage. So God delivered manna and quail and poured water from a rock. Still they complained.

Moses himself wasn’t immune; he complained about the complainers. But eventually he made the proper move and gave God the problem. Complaining about life’s challenges-and other things in general that dissatisfy us, only sours our attitude and embitters our relationship with others who probably have enough troubles of their own. While some complaints are merited, how we handle solving the issue reflects on our testimony and character. Through prayer, God can show us the positive side of our dilemma, change our attitude, and give us wisdom to take the appropriate action. When life sours on you-or when you’re tempted to complain just to be complaining, pray instead. 

Prayer: Merciful Savior, when we’re attracted to complaining, draw us to prayer.

Accepting God’s Will-Regardless by Martin Wiles

I watched curiously as the odd fellow snatched the belt dangling from my robe and bound his hands and feet with it. Was he destitute, or was there some purpose in his queer actions?

God saved me from the clutches of empty religion and commissioned me as a missionary. While on my third missionary journey, my companions and I visited the town of Caesarea and lodged with a local deacon and his four unmarried daughters. While here, this curious man with a strange name-Agabus, performed his belt-grabbing feat and gave me a warning, So shall the owner of this belt be bound by the Jewish leaders in Jerusalem and turned over to the Romans (v.11 NLT).

I didn’t doubt the possibility of his warning. Most of the Jewish authorities didn’t care to hear about Jesus being the Messiah or their responsibility for killing him. I simply wanted to obey God’s will regardless. Then Paul answered, “Why are you weeping and breaking my heart? I am ready not only to be bound, but also to die in Jerusalem for the name of the Lord Jesus” (Acts 21:13). So I went to Jerusalem. And the frenzied prophet’s warning materialized.

When God changed Paul’s heart, he did so radically. As long as he was obeying God’s directive, he forged ahead regardless of the consequences.  Accepting God’s will isn’t about obstinate actions or martyr complexes. Paul appeared to possess both but had neither. He was simply determined.
God’s Word contains his general requirements for everyone. His specific will is found there also but only revealed when we ask for it and confess our willingness to follow it regardless of the cost. Only as we obey can we reach the pinnacle of personal satisfaction. Are you ready to follow God’s personal agenda regardless of the cost?

Prayer: Savior, give us courage to ask for Your will and then obey it.

Failure Permitted Try Again by Martin Wiles

I immediately had reservations I was cut out for such a “preppy” high school, but I had no choice. I was a minor, and my parents made important decisions for me.

Fourteen is a challenging time for a young boy. I was coming of age, and within a few years would be able to drive, vote and move out on my own. In the meantime, I was locked in a high school I wasn’t sure I could adjust to. Rigid academic demands along with strict rules like no hair touching the collar or eyebrows made this hippie at heart bristle. Several failing grades, coupled with the principal’s constant criticism of my hair length, made me feel as if I were a failure. Mom and Dad quickly realized having me here wasn’t a good investment and placed me in public school.

Solomon recognized our human weaknesses and wrote, There is not a single person in all the earth who is always good and never sins (Ecclesiastes 7:20 NLT).

Removing me from a private school didn’t alleviate future failures. I had my share before graduating high school and since-from a few unacceptable grades in college to financial meltdown to family breakdown. But I learned failing didn’t make me a failure.

God gives many chances as the Bible and experience prove. No one is flawless-nor do we live in a faultless world, but I don’t have to be perfect for God to accept me. While he has expectations, he also allows mistakes. Having a heart that’s sensitive to godly things, confessing when we fall short of his standards and pledging not to repeat the same mistake are evidences we understand God’s “Failure Permitted Try Again” program.

Prayer: Thank You merciful Lord for being a God of many chances and for loving us through our failures.

Paid In Full by Martin Wiles

I wasn’t old enough to drive, but Dad said, “If you want it, you’ll have to buy it.”

I was fourteen when Dad brought home a new Chevrolet Vega. As he backed out of our driveway on his first day of ownership, his prize stopped in its tracks. Instead of returning it to the dealership, he offered me the chance to purchase it. I did, and for the next six years I offered monthly sacrifices. Needless to say, I was excited when the loan was paid.

Old Testament priests had a tireless job. God instructed his people to bring animal sacrifices (among other kinds) as payment for their sins. Priests had the responsibility of slaying animals and offering a portion on an altar. Theirs was a bloody and repetitious job since the people habitually broke God’s commands.

But Jesus’ sacrifice was radically different. He does not need to offer sacrifices every day like the other high priests. They did this for their own sins first and then for the sins of the people. But Jesus did this once for all (Hebrews 7:27 NLT). God wrote “Paid in Full” when Jesus drew his final breath.

Jesus paid for our sins completely and finally. He’s the High Priest presently interceding for us to God the Father. Since I have the same problem God’s ancient people had-I tend to regularly mess up, I’m glad the once-for-all sacrifice has been made. No more repeated bringing of sacrifices, no more living with continuous guilt and no more existing in a constant state of fear that I’ve offended a righteous God. In place of “sinner” pasted on my forehead, God has inscribed; “Paid in Full.” Have you accepted Christ’s offer to pay your debt in full?

Prayer: Thank You Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for paying our sin debt completely.

Knowing We Belong by Martin Wiles

“I think this will work,” the lady responsible for processing the paperwork said, but it didn’t.

Yellowed by age, Mom delivered my birth certificate to me-along with my baby book, after she tired of storing them both. Now I needed the birth certificate as proof I was a citizen of my country so my wife and I could leave on a mission trip requiring passports.

Before I was a PK (preacher’s kid), I was an AB (Army brat). My birth certificate proudly states I was born at Patterson Army Hospital Fort Monmouth, New Jersey, to Elsie Lee (Martin) Wiles and Boyce William Wiles. Unfortunately, this didn’t satisfy those responsible for issuing passports. They returned it saying I needed an official birth certificate from the state of New Jersey-even though the certificate plainly carries the state seal.

Being a citizen of a particular country is exciting; belonging to parents who stick with you is exhilarating. Being confident we’re part of God’s family is more important than anything else. John tells how we can know. And how can we be sure we belong to him? By obeying his commandments (I John 2:3 NLT).

What assures we’re part of God’s family is two-fold: belief in him and love for one another (I John 3:23). Our world is inhabited by many who don’t know one or the other or either of their parents-some because they’ve been adopted, others because a parent walked away and forfeited responsibility. But God is never ashamed we’re his children. He proudly displays our birth certificates which read: Children of the King, born in eternity past to God the Father, forever safe by the seal of the Holy Spirit. Do you belong?

Prayer: Thank You Heavenly Father we can know we’re eternally Yours.

Failure To Understand by Martin Wiles

I’ve had to do it with cats, dogs and chickens. It wasn’t ever easy but always necessary.

Some call it merciful; others scream cruelty. When an animal is suffering with no hope of recovery, a veterinarian will often suggest putting them to sleep. I’ve done it with a beloved Himalayan cat, an adored Dachshund and my favorite rooster, Rochester. As with friends and family who’ve contracted incurable diseases ending in death, I didn’t understand why the animals I loved had to die.

Many years prior to Jesus’ birth, Isaiah predicted his death. But it was the LORD’s good plan to crush him and cause him grief. Yet when his life is made an offering for sin, he will have many descendants (Isaiah 53:10 NLT). When the time actually arrived and Jesus informed his followers he would leave them and that it would be by the cruel method of crucifixion, they didn’t understand. Why did he have to go, and why in such a cruel fashion?

I’ve had a lifetime of “I don’t understand’s.” Some happened to me personally, others to my family, some to friends and still others to casual acquaintances. And I’ve learned God doesn’t give me an explanation for everything-nor is he required to. While in the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus realized his crucifixion was near but wasn’t excited about the prospect of it. However, he took the proper course of action by trusting his heavenly Father and praying for his will to be accomplished. He was the world’s sacrificial Lamb who needed to die for our sins. When events in your life don’t make sense, learn to trust God’s heart and submit to his will.

Prayer: Thank You Merciful Savior for the comfort of knowing You’re in control even when we don’t understand life’s events.

Moving God’s Hand by Martin Wiles

Somewhere in the middle of my prayer, I pleaded, “Lord, we need $120.” 

My wife and I were moving eight miles away, but this didn’t lessen our challenges. One was internet service with a former provider. Everything appeared to be on schedule until we received an email stating, “We can’t process your order. You have a past due amount.”

Two phone hours later, we discovered the error. Instead of disconnecting the service on our previous move day as requested, they entered our pro-rated amount as a partial payment, turned the balance over to the collection department and terminated our already discontinued service. Now they were penalizing us for a mistake they wouldn’t admit.

So I prayed. God’s answer came in a quiet impression during my restless night’s sleep: “Sell something.” As antique collectors, we had plenty, but the challenge was finding buyers for what God said to sell-a china cabinet that had been convened in our booth for months and Lays and Lance cookie jars we didn’t intend to sell. Within an hour of igniting the open sign, my wife had disposed of all three, netting more than enough to pay our bill.

Abraham’s servant also discovered prayer works. His master sent him on a wife-finding mission for his son. Knowing the importance of the journey, he prayed for God to act; O LORD, God of my master, Abraham, please give me success (Genesis 24:42 NLT). Shortly thereafter, Isaac’s future wife materialized. 

The most scholarly theologian can’t explain how prayer works, but experience has taught me it moves God’s hand. So when you’re at your wits end-or even on just every ordinary day, cast a prayer God’s way and marvel over what he does with it.

Prayer: Thank You heavenly Father that You’re never more than a prayer away.

God Unlimited by Martin Wiles

I remember the first time I donned them. I detested every minute, but the alternative wasn’t enticing. I’ve had limited sight since I was a young boy. Glasses are a required part of my wardrobe if I’m to see clearly ten feet and farther or two feet and nearer.

Even if my eyes were 20/20, my sight would still be limited. Eyes are only constructed to see clearly for a certain distance, and they can’t see through solid objects. I can see an airplane several thousand feet above the earth in a clear sky but can’t see tomorrow. From a mountain peak, I may see hundreds of miles, but tomorrow is invisible. As a small boy sitting on my father’s shoulders at a local parade, I could see half the floats, but thirty years into my future is unknowable.

Fortunately, God’s eyesight is perfect close up, far away and into the future. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account (Hebrews 4:13).

While I’m bound by time, God can enter or escape it. He can know what I can’t comprehend, see what I can’t perceive and control what I can’t master. He can outdistance the speed of light and observe the entire parade.

Worshipping an unlimited God is exciting. I don’t have to worry about tomorrows because he’s already where I’m not and knows what I’ll face in each of them. He may not remove all the obstacles and challenges, but he’ll prepare me today to face what I’ll have to experience tomorrow. Nothing before us is more powerful than the God behind us.

Prayer: All-powerful God, when fears of tomorrows cloud our todays, strengthen our trust in Your unlimited ability.

Worthy Commitments: Making It A Habit To Tell

Series: Worthy Commitments

Hearing her say “Yes I will” was the sweetest words I’d ever heard, and I couldn’t wait to tell someone. Anyone. Everyone.

I was recovering from a broken relationship; she was enduring an abusive one. Mine terminated without me having a choice; she elected to end hers. We were work acquaintances and later friends who became lovers. And when I finally popped the question and she said yes, I was so elated I told everyone about my life’s new and exciting direction.

God brought David from an insignificant family where his main responsibility was tending his father’s sheep to being anointed as the king of an enormous Israeli kingdom. His journey wasn’t without roadblocks and pitfalls-particularly when the king he was to replace made several attempts on his life. But in the final analysis, God established him securely on the throne as promised. When he did, David praised him personally and in the presence of others. I will sing of your love and justice, LORD. I will praise you with songs (Psalm 101:1 NLT).

Bad news is widely disseminated through the media sources; good news should be shared even more extensively. Believers have the best news available and should joyfully tell of God’s love and goodness as David did. A “yes” to a marriage proposal is wonderful, but forgiveness of all my sins is much better. Experiencing love from a marriage partner is reassuring, but God’s unconditional love is far more comforting. Having a friend or lover attempt to meet all my needs is encouraging, but a relationship with a powerful God who actually can is electrifying. Through Jesus Christ, God transforms us from sinners to saints, and that’s enough to shout about.

Prayer: Prod us Father to regularly tell of Your love and goodness.

Worthy Commitments: Choosing Company Carefully

Series: Worthy Commitments

Sam* was trouble, but Sam was my friend. Sure, I had heard the saying, “Bad company corrupts good morals,” but as a teen hounded by raging peer pressure, it was a difficult standard to maintain. I met Sam when my father began pastoring a local church. He was one of the deacon’s kids. I had also heard preacher’s kids get in trouble by hanging around with deacon’s children. In my case, it was true.

Sam and I were beginning the same public high school. Not liking school any better than I did, he quickly introduced me to the art of cutting school. In 1975, it was easy since students were allowed to miss thirty days per school year with hardly a worry anyone would call your parents inquiring why you were absent. Sam was also a drinker and familiarized me with the alleged pleasures of alcohol. In short order, I was a teen who drank heavily and rarely attended school.

David made a wise commitment to avoid friends like Sam. I will search for faithful people to be my companions. Only those who are above reproach will be allowed to serve me (Psalm 101: 6 NLT).

If we’re not careful, we can choose friends who-while good at heart, aren’t good at influencing. Sam would have done anything for me, but what he did do I didn’t need. When choosing friends, select people near your age range, of the same marital status, who hold similar values as you and who will build you up through encouragement and holding you accountable. Most importantly, choose friends who love God supremely and others as themselves. These companions will complement your character rather than corrupt it.

Prayer: Spirit of Almighty God, enable us to choose friends who honor You and exert godly influences.

Worthy Commitments: Staying Away From Temptation by Martin Wiles

Series: Worthy Commitments

I held onto the habit for some fifteen years. Even now, the smell is sometimes unbearably enticing.

At fourteen, I started smoking tobacco. Back when you could walk into a store and say, “My mom (or dad) wants a pack of _______________,” and the clerk would hand them over without question. Back when high schools actually had smoking sections for those who did, and back when smoking was allowed in restaurants and retail stores. Smoking was even permitted on airplanes, in hospitals and in doctor’s offices.

What I was doing a large part of America and the world imitated. Tobacco (not cotton) was king and ruled by addiction. Even though I didn’t use medical assistance to quit, the demons pranced around in my head attempting to convince me I needed what I was struggling to discard. Years later, I realize one draw would still suck me back into this enslaving habit. That’s why I choose to scamper away from all forms of what’s evil for me.

This was David’s way of thinking as well. I will reject perverse ideas and stay away from every evil (Psalm 101:4 NLT). Paul agreed when he encouraged early Christians to abstain from all appearance of evil (I Thessalonians 5:22 KJV).

While God won’t send temptations, neither will he necessarily remove them when we knowingly place ourselves in harm’s way. He will, however, empower us to overcome enticements to commit evil, but we must trust him for the power to succeed. We must also exercise wisdom by staying away from what experience has taught us are personal weak spots. Don’t presume upon God. Commit to stay away from even the slightest hints of evil.

Prayer: Guide us, merciful Father, away from evil things that would enslave us and tarnish our reputations.

Worthy Commitments: Dress In Humility by Martin Wiles

Series: Worthy Commitments

“If you put it together, it goes together” was my paternal grandfather’s philosophy on matching clothes. It’s why he could stroll into the living room with striped pants, a checkered shirt and a pin-striped coat and ask my grandmother; “Does this match?” I never witnessed her laugh at him, but she would gently say, “No it doesn’t,” and steer him to a few changes.

What we dress ourselves with is important. Proper apparel may determine whether we’re hired for a particular job, if our children are sent home from school to change clothes or whether we catch the eye of a prospective date. 

David had something else in mind that’s essential to our wardrobe: humility. I will not endure conceit and pride (Psalm 101:5 NLT).

My grandfather wore this as well. At five foot six, 165 pounds, he didn’t have an impressive physique. Nor did his voice resonate with deep baritone octaves. His genealogical tree bore no famous or wealthy ancestors, and he carried on the tradition. He was just a simple man who enjoyed loving people. But he did manage to bear the most important fruit of humility. He never considered himself better than others, and he realized his life’s station was solely because of God’s grace. Not a bad combination.

Humility isn’t weak spiritedness or low self-esteem. Humility is acknowledging God as responsible for who we presently are, what we currently have, and for all we’ll ever be. When dressed in humility, we’ll never think more highly of ourselves than we should, and our horizontal relationship with the Father will improve our vertical connections with others. Be proud, but only because of who you are in Christ.

Prayer: Remind us Lord Jesus that we’re only who we are because of who You are.

Worthy Commitments: Be Pure by Martin Wiles

Series: Worthy Commitments

I knew I shouldn’t be there. Mom and Dad taught me better, but at the moment I was in teenage rebellious mode.

Some look back at their teenage years with pride and nostalgia; I look back with regret and shame. Regret that I failed to learn, that I skipped school every chance I had and that I daydreamed when I went. And shame over the poor decisions I made about other activities.

Drive-ins were popular in the 1970s-especially those showing X-rated movies. After all, America was in the middle of a sexual revolution. Even though I wasn’t of age, I agreed to go with some buddies who weren’t of age either. What I saw I enjoyed then but regretted later. The vulgar images embossed my young mind, and thirty-six years later I can still see them if I try.

Perhaps this is why David made a commitment to look away from anything corrupt. I will refuse to look at anything vile and vulgar (Psalm 101:3 NLT). While he wasn’t always successful, his intentions were honorable.

Eyes are windows to the soul. What I see makes an impression that arouses emotions. When the feelings are interpreted as positive, I follow with actions-moral or immoral. David’s were immoral, and so were mine. But the opposite can also be true. Looking at what’s clean results in the same kind of actions. Jesus said happiness comes from being pure in heart (i.e. mind, will and emotions).  If you’re glancing at the wrong things, it’s not too late to stop. God gives power to focus on what’s pure so we can think and act the same way. Where are your eyes roving that they shouldn’t?

Prayer: Father of purity and light, guide us to look at only what’s holy so our actions will honor You.

Worthy Commitments: Living With Integrity by Martin Wiles

Series: Worthy Commitments

I taught her history, but she was conveniently absent the day I gave a chapter test. *Tamika was smart but lazy when it came to studying. I made an appointment for her to make up the test during her study hall, but I knew her mindset: “He’ll be teaching so he won’t be observing me.”

At home, Tamika delicately wrote the answers to the test questions on a tiny piece of two inch square paper. She came to class the next day in an oversized coat when it wasn’t cold enough outside or inside for her wardrobe. I was immediately suspicious. As she took her test, I noticed her repeatedly lifting her arm. When I was certain she was cheating, I confiscated the cheat sheet and assigned her a “zero.”

David’s goal was integrity. I will be careful to live a blameless life…I will lead a life of integrity in my own home (Psalm 101:2 NLT). He didn’t always succeed in living up to his or God’s standards, but he made valiant attempts. In spite of his unfaithfulness with another man’s wife, occasional lies and his periodic failure as a parent, his overall goal was obedience to God’s commands.

Integrity isn’t perfection, but it is making a valid effort to do the right things when everyone or no one is looking. Proper decisions only when being watched aren’t honorable in God’s sight. Determination, courage, faith and constant trust in God are all requirements for being a person of integrity, but they’re worth the effort. What will it take for you to do the right thing regardless of the consequences or of who’s looking?

Prayer: Father, help us to be people of integrity who commit to obeying Your commands regardless of the consequences.
*Name changed to protect privacy.

Conquering Depression: Trusting Through Hurts by Martin Wiles

Series: Conquering Depression

John* and Susie* were high school sweethearts who married shortly after Susie graduated, but soon thereafter their relationship changed.

Once so in love with John, Susie suddenly became distant. Her unhappiness showed up in crying spells and aversions to his attempts to show her affection. After six months, she walked out telling him, “I don’t love you anymore.” John quickly discovered a disturbing secret. Susie had been unfaithful with one of his work associates. Broken trust sent John to the brink of depression, and he delved into harmful habits hoping they would lessen his pain.

David was familiar with broken trust. He had been a faithful warrior in Saul’s army and had helped him defeat his enemies. Now the king was rewarding him by running him out of the kingdom, giving his wife to another man and by threatening his life. David, however, trusted God for deliverance. Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you (Psalm 143:8).

Broken trust-especially when it emanates from people we’re in a close relationship with, can precipitate mild or even severe periods of depression. These may be accompanied by disbelief and misunderstanding over how someone we love and who supposedly loves us could hurt us so badly.

Regardless of how many others betray our trust, God never will. He’s a friend that sticks closer than a sibling and the greatest source of comfort we’ll ever discover. When others hurt us through betrayal, we can turn to God for a healing that can’t be found in any other source. If someone has betrayed you and sent you into a tailspin of depression, let God heal your emotional struggle by teaching you how to trust again.

Prayer: Thank You loving Savior for standing by us even when others don’t.
*Names changed to protect the privacy of the individual.*

Conquering Depression: Trust And Believe by Martin Wiles

Series: Conquering Depression

The “blues” is a style of music and also a state of mind.

A musical genre originating in African American communities of the Deep South around the end of the nineteenth century, the songs developed from old spirituals, work songs, field shouts, hollers and chants. The “blues” are a unique musical style formed by specific chord progressions and flattening certain notes and are a reference to the “blue devils” which means melancholy or sadness.

Perhaps this is why depression is sometimes referred to as having “the blues.” When depressed, we’re in a melancholy state of mind along with a low status of mood that often brings with it the “I don’t feel like doing anything’s.” These unhealthy combinations normally affect our physical well-being as well as our thoughts, behaviors and feelings.

David was in a low state of mind, but he believed healing was possible with God’s assistance. For the glory of your name, O LORD, preserve my life. Because of your faithfulness, bring me out of this distress (Psalm 143:11 NLT). He had experienced God’s deliverance in the past when he battled wild animals trying to kill his sheep. Presently he had no reason to doubt that God would liberate him from a jealous king who wanted him dead.

Parcel to healing from depressed moods or full blown depression is believing in God’s ability and eagerness to mend our emotions. Remembering what he’s done in the past gives us hope for the present and future. Depressed emotional states interfere with our work for him since depression arrests our ability to focus clearly. God wants us to enjoy life and serving him. Have faith he will lead you to the sources of help that will heal your emotional struggles.

Prayer: Thank You Father for knowing us completely and for providing the physical, spiritual and emotional healing we need.

Conquering Depression: Prayer’s Healing Power by Martin Wiles

Series: Conquering Depression

Situated on the eastern border of the Dead Sea Coast, the Ein Gedi nature reserve covers almost 151,000 square feet and includes two spring fed streams with water that flows year round and produces around three million cubic meters of water annually. It is also home to numerous species of plants and wildlife.

In this wilderness, David hid from a ravenous king who, when he learned of David’s whereabouts, mustered three thousand men and pursued him. Feeling the call of nature, Saul entered a cave-the very one where David and his men hid. David was close enough to kill the king yet refused to do so.

But this constant running and hiding affected David’s emotions. His future was bright, but his present was overflowing with fear that he and his army would be slaughtered at any moment. He did what any believer normally does when in a disturbing situation-he prayed. Show me where to walk, for I have come to you in prayer (Psalm 143:8 NLT).

Prayer is the believer’s ultimate conversation with God-and as such is always appropriate, but it’s even more so when we’re struggling emotionally. While prayer isn’t normally a one step cure-all for depression, it is an essential component of emotional healing. Through prayer, God can give insight into the cause of the depression as well as wisdom to know the necessary steps for healing. He also comforts us by reminding us with the still small voice of his Spirit that he understands our struggles, controls them and wants to heal them. Prayer is the salve that soothes our troubled hearts when everything else fails. Let God calm your emotional turmoil through a regular practice of conversation with him.

Prayer: Thank You Lord Jesus for being the High Priest who understands our struggles and gives us strength to endure them.

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Conquering Depression: Facing The Cause by Martin Wiles

Series: Conquering Depression

I was but didn’t realize it. After all, I didn’t want to lie around and sleep or be alone. I wasn’t crying for unknown reasons or overeating. Nor did I feel like a dark cloud was hanging overhead. 

My symptom was simply fear of unexplainable pains. Did the twinge in my chest signal an approaching heart attack? Was the sting in my stomach a reoccurring ulcer? Nights were battles against cold sweats brought on by worry about major medical melt downs. My family doctor finally convinced me I was healthy; I was simply depressed.

Experiencing an extremely difficult situation that involved losing a career and home and watching my family disintegrate led to my depression. But I hadn’t stop praying, reading the Bible or going to church. Weren’t those the cure-alls for staving off depression?

I discovered conquering depression involves addressing its cause which may be medically based, spiritually induced, circumstance related or a combination of all. David’s was caused by a jealous king trying to prevent him from realizing God’s promise. In your unfailing love, silence my enemies; destroy all my foes, for I am your servant (Psalm 143:12). His cure was either eliminating the king or viewing his circumstances in a different light.

We may be powerless to change our circumstances, but we can allow God to help us reevaluate them and use them as opportunities for spiritual growth. Getting medical assistance may also be necessary so we can cope with the symptoms until the ultimate cause is addressed. My healing required both. Depression carries no shame. God understands our emotional struggles and desires to help us experience complete healing. Let him show you what’s causing your depression so you can experience emotional healing.

Prayer: Enable us, Almighty Father, to allow You to heal our emotional struggles.

DOWNLOAD MY NEW E BOOK, "AUTHENTIC CHRISTIANITY." A list of do’s and don’ts. For many this is what Christianity entails. Don’t lie. Don’t cheat. Don’t steal. Don’t lust after what others have or people of the opposite sex. Don’t swear. Or drink. Or smoke. Don’t, don’t, don’t.

Conquering Depression: Disobedience’s Dead End by Martin Wiles

Series: Conquering Depression

Charlie* was a good girl. Though her father rarely darkened the church doors, her mother made sure she and her brothers attended. She accepted Jesus as a teenager during a church revival and after graduation married her high school sweetheart. They soon entered full-time Christian ministry.

But somewhere along the way, Charlie began to change. Her love for church dwindled, and her new friends were bad influences. She began experimenting with sinful behaviors which accelerated her downhill slide. Eventually Charlie walked out on her family. When you see her today, her sadness is evident even though she smiles and pretends to enjoy her new lifestyle.

David once ventured into forbidden areas and discovered what Charlie did. Sin never delivers what it promises (II Samuel 11). He attempted to enjoy life by hiding lies, sexual immorality and murder but received only depression and God’s discipline (II Samuel 12). He learned obedience was more profitable. Teach me to do your will, for you are my God (Psalm 143:10 NLT).

When it becomes evident we’re depressed, we should immediately examine our relationship with God to determine if sinful behaviors are causing it. Disobedience can be a major cause of a believer’s depression. Anytime we choose to walk away from God in any area or willingly defy his commands, an emotional struggle develops. If not quickly settled through confession, the emotional war will be lost to depression. Sin always takes us farther than we want to go, keeps us longer than we want to stay and costs us more than we’re willing to pay. If you’re struggling with depression, determine if there are any areas of rebellion in your life that need confessing.

Prayer: Merciful Savior, reveal any areas of rebellion in our lives preventing our emotional healing.
*Name changed to protect privacy.

DOWNLOAD MY NEW E BOOK, "AUTHENTIC CHRISTIANITY." A list of do’s and don’ts. For many this is what Christianity entails. Don’t lie. Don’t cheat. Don’t steal. Don’t lust after what others have or people of the opposite sex. Don’t swear. Or drink. Or smoke. Don’t, don’t, don’t.

Admitting Our Helplessness by Martin Wiles

Series: Conquering Depression

I was in a group but that didn’t alleviate my anxiety-nor did the fact we had an expert tour guide.

While I enjoy cave tours where I can ponder underground structures, hear the history of stalactites and stalagmites, watch fish mill about and view other animal life, there’s one part that makes me nervous. When the guide barks, “Now everyone stand very still,” and then slams the light switch to the “off” position, I get anxious. What if they don’t come back on, or what if the flashlight batteries die? Darkness is eerie; absolute darkness is nerve-racking.

David was a darkness expert. He slept in it while tending his father’s sheep, and he hid in it in a cave because a jealous king wanted him dead. The enemy pursues me, he crushes me to the ground; he makes me dwell in the darkness like those long dead (Psalm 143:3).

Depression often brings with it feelings of “darkness” and confinement, as if lingering under an ominous cloud that neither dissipates nor delivers rain. Conquering these periods of depression entails admitting our helplessness. I was vulnerable in the dark cave and so was David. I was at the guide’s mercy as he was the king’s. David may have been a future king, but presently he was a runaway warrior on the brink of depression. Helplessness isn’t easy to admit. We’re more likely to have an attitude of “There’s nothing I can’t conquer.” But like the addict who must confess their addiction before help can be effective, so conquering depression involves admitting to God we’re helpless to overcome without his assistance.

If you’re struggling with depression, admit your helplessness to God so he can direct you toward healing.

Prayer: Thank You Heavenly Father that when we’re at our weakest You’re at Your strongest.

DOWNLOAD MY NEW E BOOK, "AUTHENTIC CHRISTIANITY." A list of do’s and don’ts. For many this is what Christianity entails. Don’t lie. Don’t cheat. Don’t steal. Don’t lust after what others have or people of the opposite sex. Don’t swear. Or drink. Or smoke. Don’t, don’t, don’t.

Consulting the Right Sources by Martin Wiles

Series: Conquering Depression

I normally experience small bouts of it at winter’s onset. SAD or seasonal affective disorder. While not classified a major mood disorder, it’s “a specifier of major depression.”

SAD was first described and named by Norman Rosenthal and his colleagues at the National Institute of Mental Health in 1984. Other names include winter blues, summer depression and seasonal depression. Symptoms include oversleeping, overeating, difficulty waking up, lack of energy, trouble concentrating as well as withdrawing from friends, family and social activities-all of which can lead to depression.

SAD and other types of depression can result from medical, self-inflicted, circumstance related or Satan instigated sources. While we may not initially know the cause, it’s important to consult the proper source when we’ve determined we’re depressed.

David’s depression was circumstance related and Satan instigated. God anointed him as Israel’s king, but prior to assuming the role he faced jealousy and life-threatening tactics from the sitting king. He found himself running for his life and cowering in wilderness caves. When his depression became unbearable, he approached the right source. I lift my hands to you in prayer. I thirst for you as parched land thirsts for rain. Come quickly, LORD, and answer me, for my depression deepens (Psalm 143:6-7 NLT).

God is our ultimate emotional healer when we’re depressed. Our efforts toward restored health should include praying for guidance, searching God’s Word for comfort, socializing with those holding common beliefs and confiding in trustworthy Christian acquaintances. When God directs-and when our condition warrants, it may also involve visiting a doctor for medicine to cope with the symptoms so we can function and/or scheduling regular visits with a Christian counselor. Let God direct you to the proper steps so healing can occur.

Prayer: Thank You Lord Jesus for being our ultimate healer-physically, spiritually and emotionally.

Christmas Punch by Michelle Wiles

Quick and Easy Christmas Punch

1 2ltr Cheerwine
1 2ltr Ginger Ale
1 Large Can Pineapple Juice
1 C. Sugar

Mix the Sugar and the Cheerwine together in the punch bowl (the Cheerwine will dissolve the sugar).
Add the remaining ingredients.
Makes 1 Large Punch Bowl.
Do not pre-mix this punch!

Expect Something Better by Martin Wiles

Series: Living Life To The Fullest

When I was young, I had big dreams. At twelve, I felt God wanted me to be a Bible teacher and perhaps preacher. I knew it would take education. By the time I reached the teen years, I wasn’t sure anymore. Going to school lost all appeal. As a young adult, I yearned to drive a truck, but one day of school changed my mind. 

All my dream jobs conjured up pictures of enjoyment and a hefty paycheck. I finally managed to achieve the preacher and Bible teacher position but as of yet haven’t witnessed the bulging paycheck. But it’s unnecessary. I can live a fulfilled life by doing what God has gifted me to do while anticipating a better life in eternity.

As an aged apostle, John envisioned a brighter future. Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,” for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away (Revelation 21:1).

Living life to the fullest is not about escaping the harsh facets of reality. Nor does it adopt a “pie in the sky by and by” mentality. Abundant living absorbs the most out of this life while realizing there’s a better life to come.

Sin and its consequences taint this life and steal much of what God intends we enjoy. Death, tragedies, crime, abuse and countless forms of inequality are rife, but for the believer faith is what builds our hope in what we cannot yet see. We enjoy the present creation but long for a new earth and heaven where all sin’s consequences are erased. So when life gets you down, let your faith look forward to a beautiful eternity with the One who gave himself for our sins.

Prayer: Thank You merciful God for preparing a wonderful eternal place for those who accept Your love.